I may have been here (here being North Carolina, USA) only a few weeks, but as the inquisitive Kenyan that I am, I've learnt a great deal. From mostly being inside the house, because us of the darker skin pigmentation were NOT built for winter (we'll get to that). Here's 10 things the Kenyan in me has had to deal with so far...
1. Kenyans are EVERYWHERE! & if they find out you're from the +254, its a celebration! Oh, and tribalism only exists in Kenya. Go figure.
2. Be ready for stupid questions like "You can speak English?!" or "They have internet in your country?!". Almost stabbed some schoopid woman. With my Bic Fine. Forgive them, for they do not know...
3. Oh, internet is SOOO a basic need! I see it now...
4. Pardon my French, but school is RUBBISH! Repeat after me, "All you need is YouTube..."
5. As a result of being able to get EVERYTHING, from food to A CAR, to your house, there is little need to ever venture out of it. Enter YouTube clips on weight loss excercise...
6.The stuff with "70% Discount" written on it is actually much cooler than the normal stuff. Ama its the Kenyan in me, hmmm...
7. Credit cards are evil. Avoid them with the same intensity you would chlamydia.
8. The shortest distance between two points has always been a straight line. But thanks to motorways, a 1km trip turns into a 5km one! Thika Road massive, be prepared...
9. Not ONCE since I came here have I seen dust or mud. So I've never had to clean my shoes, clothes & nearly forgot I have allergies...
10. HD is VERY serious. I learnt this when watching Titanic (circa the Second World War) and was a groupie for the ship sinking scene. Shindwo.
Very randomly, Kenyans have a terminology for other Kenyans who've just arrived in the States. They call them "Fresh off the Boat". Now I'm not one to draw parallels, but HEEEEE????
Tony, you forget to tell them that the Kenyans are still the same. The men still grotesque, peeing in bushes and hitting on women with strange techniques. The women still snobby, a bit of arrogance and have everything done for them and to sum it up, the two ARE NEVER ON TIME!!!!!
ReplyDeleteLol!!! =D Si I've laughed! Good things! In fact let us discover more and more each day! Yaay, finally you understand what internet is all about...yes that's what we've been saying. Now for #twitter ;-) Credit cards ARE evil! its the system. Thankfully I wont still be on Thicker road then..hopefully. And isn't it such a phenomena NOT to get dust on your shoes, that was quite something.
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